Growing up

Posting after a longtime but the topic had been decided and partially completed a long time ago. The basic inspiration to write this post is an article that appeared in India Today a couple of weeks ago. I dont remember the name of the article but the gist of the article was that young people have become very fashion conscious and are trying to growup earlier than it is supposed to be. The aggravation of the author can be understood by a small incident which he/she recites about a 14 year old girl trying to get breast implants and the icing on the top of the whole idiocracy being that the kid was accompanied by her mom and the fact that this hasnt been an isolated incident and has actually become quite common. A model who joined up modeling at a age of 19 and can now be considered a veteran, is appalled by the current scenario of the fashion industry where 19 years is considered old in contrast to the time when her 19 years were considered very very less. After all this blabbering I finally arrive at the topic. Why are people trying to growup even before actually growing up??? For the people searching for a conclusion regarding the matter be prepared to be dissappointed as this post doesnt answer the question but rather adds more “?”’s to the already big question.

Do U the remember the first time U saw a bald headed old guy in a T-Shirt a pair of three fourths and laughed Ur ass off??? People miss out on a lot of things while growing up and tend to try to experience those in their latter days and thus become successful in embarrassing themselves. That seems like a logical thing to do even after considering the embarrassment. Not because of their age but due to the experience they have gained by being kicked around by life and realize the ramifications of their actions. On the other hand a 8 year old kid showing off her belly button with a stick-on tattoo on her non-existential hip and with her freshly manicured nails would be considered cute.

The current trend can be attributed to the parents to some extent and to peer pressure to some extent and to the glamour of show bizz to some extent. Teaching a kid to learn the value of money if fine but is it really necessary to teach him about stocks and the various cons of the trade??? Is it really necessary for a teenager to start being stingy??? No need to comment on peer pressure considering the fact that kids are impressionable and that fact that we are a bunch of sheep. And yeah showbizz, one of my favourite topics. Child artist in one movie and 3 years later a heroine in another (Hanishka in “Koi Mil Gaya” and “Desamuduru”).

1) A kid starts carrying a mobile to stay in contact with his maxim girl(kid) and his badass peeps of the neighbourhood. A teenager(under sixteen obviously) freaking out with his friends with a bottle of beer. A working bachelor trying really hard to accomplish his goals in his life with a 16 hr work schedule. A grumpy married guy harassing the neighbouring kids.

2) A kid grows up into a teenager and looks in a muddy playground and wonders if he would be allowed to jump into the muddy waters and splash around for a bit. A teenager grows up into a working man and wonders if he would be rejected by the society for running around girls. A married man prays for a single day where he would be allowed to just enjoy a beer and passout infront of the TV without being bothered by his wife of his responsibilities.

3) A kid plays in the muddy waters, returns with scars on his kneecaps. A teenager sneaking around to catch a movie with his girl or his peeps. A fresh graduate enjoying his first payday with a bottle of beer and wasting his breath on something ridiculousy stupid. A married man tutoring his kids after they have done with their daily rituals in the neighbourhood playground.

1) and 2) are just through different perspectives relative to time and 3) is a different scenario. While I still dont have a credible answer after all this blabbering, I have atleast been able to change the question to “Do U wanna be 1) and become 2) or would U rather take the 3rd option???”

Right and Wrong

Whatever U do, watever decisions U take, U will always be filled with the cliched question of wether its right or wrong. But even amongst the things we consider right what are the chances of our deeds being totally wrong. And morever who decides what right and wrong??? Is the so called morals or are we supposed find the answers in the teaching of our relegion or wether blindly follow the advice of the ppl we trust.

Ppl say that its the winners who write history. Cant the same be said about the laws and rules that have been imposed upon us. What rules can be called really correct. You arnt allowed to punish Ur kids for their mistakes in America. Though it may prevent child abuse, what happens to the age old saying, “Spare the rod, spoil the child”. Spitting is a finable offense in singapore(coutrsey ippili’s shirt ;)), but can that rule be followed in India??? And my personal favourite doubt. By following the rules set by the government are we willingly discarding of the concept of free will???

And the rules to be followed, passed down the centuries how correct do they stand to the present times and situations. For example the seperating of newly weds during specific months of the year (Not sure about this but I think its called Karthika masam or something like that). For the ppl wondering what Im babling about this practise used to be followed in order to make sure that newly born babies dont have to face the tough weather(hot summer or dead winter not sure about that. The usual 9 month rule). But what relevance does it has to ppl who dont live in India. The hindus living abroad in countries with different climatic conditions follow this practise with absolutely no use and rather with adverse effects depending on the climatic conditions.

And coming on the more important matters. Are we being selfish but not dontating spare change to a 6 year old beggar or are we promoting the child to beg by being charitable. By setting a easy paper is the lecturer being charitable to all his students and gud-hearted or is he destroying the true potential of the brighter ones??? A question can also be asked  in similar lines about the reservation system. Isnt giving an extra chance to a selected few based on something that isnt relevant to the performance depriving the worthy of the right they had earned??? Are U supposed to follow Ur interests or rather the path that benefits the world or rather the path that benefits U the most.

Well I cant write anything more now. No exclusive message or question in the post, just some crap that flows through Ur mind if Ur awake at 5 AM.

Ps:- If I find any comments which suggest things like “Follow Ur heart”, “Find a healthy moderation”, “Time will make the decisions for U”, etc., Im gonna fucking kill that guy. About the ridiculous examples in para2, sry but thats all I could think off frm my limited knowledge of foreign laws. And about the karthika masam in para 3, what I have written is real.

Ps:- Will try to write more regularly, possibly they would be meaningful. And the usual sry for the improper usage of “,”’s, “.”’s and all the spelling mistakes ;).

Screw U noobs

Finally after 1 year of laying low and quitting games for more than 6 months I cant take it anymore.

So today is dedicated to gaming and the server is 172.16.31.41. Join at Ur own risk.

http://ctrlaltdel-online.com/comic.php?d=20021127.

Boys will not stay boys forever.

This post dates back to the good old childhood days when school used to be fun and telivision used to be heaven. Back in those days one of my favourite shows on the idiot box used to be “I dream of Jeanie”, a television show that ran during the period 65-70. It could be said that I used to be crazy about that show. Skipping cricket to watch it, that outta explain the craziness to some extent. Its basically the story of the ‘troubles’ of a astronaut due to a female “Djinn” named as Jeanie. The irony of the show lies in the fact that the astronaut resuces her frm her long stay of 2000 years in her bottle. Jeanie’s primary goal is to please her master but due to the lack of experience and due to ignorance about the modern age ends up bringing trouble for him. It also incudes her master’s best friend and the psychologist of the base where her master is stationed at.

The show mainly focuses on Jeanie’s love(obsession) for her master and his reluctance in marrying a Djinn. The main areas where comedy has been included are Jeanie’s ignorance, the situations her master has to go through due to her and the plight of the psychologist who is constantly subjected to the shock of witnessing most of the aftermaths of Jeanie’s doings. It also involves Jeanie and her master taking trips to the past and getting involved in some major events of the past including Napolean’s decision of trying to conquer Russia ;). It also involves the psychologist witnessing weird things such as, a elephant, a tiger, a jail and other such things in the astronauts house and oddly enough had to go through a snow storm in Florida, in the middle of July and over only 1 house. It also sports a love angle where Jeanie is in love with her master and as a result is jealous about him going out with other girls. The main problem fun begins when she tries to PROTECT him frm other girls in her own way.

The good old days(Age 12) used to be filled with my wishing for a Jeanie of my own for the primary goal of finishing my homework and stuff. Though most of the dialogues used to be greek and latin for me, it still used to be funny based purely on my visual understandingof the show. Frankly it wouldnt had much of a difference even if the show were to air in German or some other language for that matter. The boring part used to be all the conversations.

Then  arrives the age of action(Age 15-18), in other terms the Arnie fever. Though the show had stopped airing I couldnt wonder about the things that I would be wishing for if I were to get hold of my very own Jeanie. It typically used to be guns, rockets(no missiles. I was still ignorant to the concept of missiles.), wars, snipers and replacing my life with the life of John Rambo ;).

Now when I get reacquainted with the series, the period when I can understand what the characters keep babling about, I finally discover how funny the show really was. The frequent references to historical figures like Omar khayam as Jeanies friends, the real reasons why her master doesnt like it when he receives original peices of art frm Jeanie and many other things. But unfortunately now when the laughs end I cant keep my mind of the inconsistences in the script of the show. Apart frm them a lot of scientifical aspects about the life of a astronaut and other things in general.

I guess thers a time for everything. Though U dont understand everything and for the most part are ignorant there a lot of things that are enjoyable when Ur kids that might  turnup to be boring of CHILDISH when U growup. And again we reach to the conclusion that education spoils us ;).

Ps :- For people interested in the series, it is out on DVD and my peers Saini@CSL roxs ;).

A rather long stay.

Its finally that time of the year when I bitch about the education system. I hate exams. But it is also the time when I look upon the rest of the year and try to find out reasons to why I had missed all those classes, which had I attended would have reflected themselves in my answer sheets. But well cant cry over spilt milk and morever the milk aint considered spilt if U had willingly spilt it. I guess every student feels the same way when it comes to missing classes. Watever way U look at it missing classes is fun.

So I seem to have reached the end of graduation part for this life, hopefully. Soon I would be either working for my MS or for some Kufli company. Stiefands, Salary, and all others things I might be able to enjoy over the time. But still the thought of working still kills me. It makes me wonder why I hadnt concentrated on sports. I wouldnt have had to go through all this intellectual stuff. Could have been a sportsman or rather join the army in the worst case senario. Dying would suck but live action Quake would have rocked.

But everything has a price. All the fun I had in all these years thnx to the perfect enviornment for goofing off and all the friends I have met, sure seems to make all the need for studying seem worthwhile. All the gaming in labs, all the water games in NBH 3rd floor, all the night outs doing nothing except chatting about subjects that wouldnt effect us in the slightest, all the scp’s and ftp’s before assignments, all the post-phonements, all the late night movies @ lingampally, gud old RB, all the pranks on yahoo and yeah all the bumps, wouldnt forget the 1st year.

Lawn cricket, hrs of aging and quaking, all the downloading, getting caught in lab for exploring the web ;), sneaking away frm Prof Zulu to avoid hrs of sukthulu ;), all the idle roaming around the city awesome 2nd year. Enter 3rd year and enter the era of pc’s to every room. Illegal LAN, turning totally nocturnal, finding completed projects on the net ;), all the days and weeks of gaming and all the discussions after each game, all the night and night cricket matches in the corridor, all the movie premiers in the rooms and religiously watching Matrix everyday. 3rd year seemed to lasted like just 30 nights rather than 365 days.

Welcome to the yellow devil and all the days seem to be spent on the road withing a year it turns out that only 3 places worth visiting were left in a whole of 10 KM radius frm the campus and all the boozing ;). 4rth year consisted of only evenings. The 5th year was just pure chaos, all the not working for FYP, all the proxies, atleast increased my friends circle during this period. All the morning walks and thinning up etc etc.,

Aah well moral’s of the story Exams suck, Classes suck, Hostels rock, PC’s rock, LAN rocks, Vodka rocks ;), Marlboro and Davidoff rocks and finally Prof Zulu always rocks ;).

PS:- Cant decide wether to use Adios or Yepikayey to end this post. And yeah about to start studying Sanskrit so not in the mood to check for spelling mistakes and stuff.

A crumbling world Pt2.

I wokeup at the crack of dawn, without the refreshing feel of waking up frm a good night’s sleep. The ground I was lying on didnt provide me the usual soft feel of a comfortable bed and the the alarm that woke me wasnt my hip-hop alarm but rather cries and hues. I opened my eyes to find my Dad awake, apparently frm a sleepless night and my Mom sleeping with my kid brother clung to her chest. Dad was lying against a broken tree with us sharing his comfortable shoulder against our head. I looked at the sleep deprived, dust covered face of my Dad and realised for the first time how lucky I had been to have a strong shoulder like that to rest on all these years. My Dad turned to me and said with a smile, “The worst is over, We have survived it.”

I started looking around hoping to find my house but all I could find was pieces of it. The front door had collapsed but there was another larger one dividing the house into two. I stood up and walked towards it and stood staring at it. It was a couple of moments later, that I started hearing my Dad’s voice, asking me not to wander off and to keep together. A blood covered sparky came out of the house and sat beside me. My childhood home I had lived in for most of my life was now nothing more than ruins. But all I could see was my home, as it had stood yesterday morning when I had left for school. Pranay playing in the garden with sparky, Mom waving at me frm the doorway and Dad reading the paper sitting on his easy chair in the garden. All I could see was my home when I had returned yesterday evening frm the ground. Mom gosipping with the neighbours over the compund wall, probably exchanging new recipes. My Mom and my neighbour had noticed my presence when I opened the gate and my neighbour was waving at me and asking me about my day. Thats when I felt my Dad jerking me and I came to my senses. When I turned around my Mom was stading behind him, olding my brother and with a worried expression on her face. I turned again to my Dad to find him asking me what was I waving at.

The relief forces had started to arrive and were shifting every1 to camps setup by various help organisations. We were given packets of food and milk. A emergency medical centre was also setup as the local hospital was also affected by the quake. Seriously injured people were being transferred to other hospitals using helicofters. After some preliminary first aid we started to my aunts house which was located in the next town. It turns out that my Dad had called them up after we had reached the camp. After 90 minutes of long drive we arrived at my aunts house and started cleaning up.

A week had passed since the incident, all schools in the town were closed but the hospitals have just been opened partially and the relief camp was mostly disbanded except for a small division to distribute food. Most of the people had already migrated to other places for the time being. Mom was busy rewinding the whole incident increasing the length of the narration each time and Pranay was busy playing around and showing off his new clothes. Dad was busy making calls and visiting insurance offices. Sparky was just busy barking at every1. Pictures of the devastation had dropped their frequency in the news and they were now replaced by interviews with the victims and with experts in the field. The government had released aid for the victims and was promising funds for furthur research to detect such quakes in time.

That evening I went along with my Dad to visit the site where the house used to stand. Dad was one of the few sensible ppl to have insured the house and was happy that we had enough money to rebuild again. He went to discuss the details with the insurance guy leaving me all alone with the ruins. I started moving around the place remembering each part of the house. The spot in the living room where I would be usually be found, lying on the floor with a remote in my hand and switching through channels. The spot where my Mom used to sit in a chair reading her magazines and ordering me to stick to a channel. The place on the dinner table for which we sibling used to fight. The platform in the kictchen where I used to bug my Mom while she was cooking dinner. The closet where I used to lock my brother up when he used to bother me. My bed where I used to lie for hours talking on the phone with friends about girls. Those sweet memories were disturbed with the return of my Dad.

My Dad was all smiles and seemed really happy. On the way to my aunts place after dropping the insurance guy at his office my Dad was telling me that thanks to the insurance money we could afford to rebuild a new house. My mind went wandering off the dirty wall in the living room. The marks on the corner of the wall where I had drawn my first hillside scenery and had to clean it up as a punishment. Yes, we could rebuild our house but would be it the home we lost???

Ps:- @Voltaire, A couple of the posts were meant to be descriptive but Ur right. Will try to improve on that and U finally do Ur work ;).

This post may not be as U might have expected it to be based on my previous post. But this is just what I had in mind when I was writingPt1.

A crumbling world Pt1.

I was riding on a horse-carriage on a rocky road. Feeling each bump under the wheels throughout my body. It felt that the road just got bumpier and bumpier. I opened my eyes to find the ceiling swaying like a swing over my head. I could feel the bumps like slight tremors frm the ground. I could hear a faint whisper calling out my name. I stressed my ears to hear it but all I could hear was a rumbling noise and the howling of my dogs. The neighing of the horses, the sound of wheels jumping off the bumps were all gone and were replaced by the rumbling frm under me.

My eyes began to see clearly and the ceiling was still moving but much faster and the dog kept on howling. It was desperately trying to free itself frm its collar. I moved my head around and all I could see was specks of vibrating lights. Some of them were shining brightly on the floor in the faint glow of the night bulb, some of them were floating and some of them were falling down and giving birth more lights. It was then that I heard my dad’s voice for the first time. He came barging into the room screaming something and it seemed as if he was running towards me. Then I began to hear what he was screaming about. My heart skipped a beat and the world went blank inside me. All that my brain could comprehend was his words ringing in my head. “EARTHQUAKE, GET OUT”.

Then I felt his hands under me trying to throw me off the bed but he didnt need to. My legs had already started to work and had started on their own. I couldnt remember asking my legs to start running, I couldnt remember the need to wear my slippers and more than that I couldnt remember the existence of my dog, though my ears could hear it howling for its life. It was after I had reached the next room that my brain began to remember, the dog that had been my playmate for over 3 years and I began to run back to get it. I could feel my my Dad’s hands trying to drag me out but I kept shouting “I have to get sparky, I have to get sparky”. I was able to free myself frm protective clutches of my Dad and ran towards the room.

As I enetered the room, my legs began to hurt and it was then that I realised what was shining wasnt my imagination but peices of broken glass on the ground. With blood flowing out and pain filling into the emptiness that was created, I started searchign for sparky in the corner where it slept. Sparky was still howling but this time it wasnt in desperation but rather in pain. Pieces of glass were all over him and they was glowing like the night sky on his brown skin. I unlocked the chain and grabbed sparky and started running out. I saw my Dad screaming profanities at me, screaming to let go of the damn dog and save my life.

I followed my Dad to reach outside but instead of waking up frm the nightmare I started seeing the sad truth in the eyes of the grief stricken, trembling eyes of my neighbours. I could see my mother holding my brother in her arms and trying to calm his down. Mom’s are so stupid, how can a 6 yr old kid stop worrying when a 15 yr old kid couldnt??? Then my head turned towards the surroundings as I saw houses shaking like a setup of lego building blocks and ppl crying, Mothers trying to get into the crumbling houses to save their children and Dad’s trying to stop them from killing themselves. Then my eyes fell on the now unfamiliar remains of my childhood home.

It has all passed like a flash and before anyone could realise it everything every1 knew just vanished.

To be continued…..

Future

Finally decided what Im gonna do with my nxt few years. Gonna takeup a job at ATI with venki and vamsee and will ahve some fun.

Well thats all actually.

Rain

I dont really know, wether its my boredom or my happiness that has promted me to write this blog. It all started at 7pm today, when I was trying to burn some fat by indulging my body in the most non-demanding sport that I know off. TableTennis. I dont know about others but as far as Im concerned that game must have been invented by a person atleast as lazy as Iam. A game that would barely pass as a sport based on the energy required to play it but is still fun though.

So we were having a game of TT and all of a sudded it starts to rain cats and dogs. We stop our game to have a look at the rain and start swearing about how this new development would ruin any possibility of me going out. Then we return to our world and continue our game and after a few minutes of RIGOROUS gaming we decide to call it a day and return to our rooms. I dont know wether it was the tiredness or wether it was the pleasant breeze flowing but I couldnt close my door.

Sitting on the bed tired and enjoying the cold breeze I started to enjoy the finer elements of rain. The distinctive smell of water soaked mud, the pleasant beating of rain drops on the concrete floor and ofcourse the refreshing breeze. All the weariness seem to have been replaced by a freshness that only a hot bath would havee able to achieve.

Then I shift my butt to the corridor and place it on the edge of the wall, with a pillar lending support to my back and the grills preventing me frm falling into the rain. Drops of water touching my skin and even the cold and wet grills sending chills throughout my body couldnt drag me away frm the rhythmic beat of droplets of water falling on the leaves. The leaves appeared as a assortment of drums waiting for the heavy drops of water to challenge them and the drops of water trying desperately to break those leaves. It looked a whole symphony consisting of only only drums. At the moment all I could do was stare into the rain, nowhere in particular and all that flashed into my mind was AR Rehmans recent ads for some radio channel. All he says in it is “Theres music in everything.” and i understood it then completely for the firsttime.

Then after an hour of staring at the rain my paapi peth brought me back to reality and I had to leave the scenery. The rain had already stopped but it was still very hard to move. So a brisk walk till the gate procured me some hot noodles. Thers nothing better than hot spicy food in a rainy night.

Okey, enough of this crap. Will b back with a serious topic in a few hrs.

Uncertainity

Have you ever been reading a novel and right in the middle of it, wondered what would happen next??? Have you ever been, tempted to skip to the ending, just because U couldnt handle the suspense anymore??? If U have then all it says about U is that, Ur afraid of whats gonna happen next. The same way Ur afraid of what Ur life is gonna shape to. So, is it a gud thing or a bad thing that Ur afraid of the suspense that Ur future is. Ppl rushing to their astrologers say that they just want to decide whats better for them.

Some great philosophers might say that its useless being afraid and that whatever is going to happen, is just a part of Ur life. And that whatever is going to happen, will happen eventually, when it is supposed to and its best left alone, for only that time to show us that. They even state it in a poetic style, “The past is the past, the future is the future and all thats present now is this moment”.

Others, whom the saintly accuse of being human, are afraid of the uncertainity that is life. They are curious of the future that will eventually show itself, when the time is ripe. But whats the point of living, if U knew what going to happen next. Whats the point of living, if U dont have anything to look forward to. The uncertainity of life and the wait for future becoming present, isnt that what life is all about. Isnt the uncertainities that arouse our curiosity, the real beauty of life???

I dont know how to end this, except by saying that I have found myself, to be suffering with the so called disease of being human. There have been instances, where I had to leave a book uncompleted, as I couldnt handle the tension, read its end and spoiled the book for myself. There have been times, when I frantically rush through the papers, to have a look at what the stars predict for me. I dont know wether its good or bad to dream about the future, all the possibilites and then to be surprised at what it really turns out ot be. But thats what keeps me going through the mundane life. The quest to findout what possibility future has chosen to become, of all the innumerable possibilities.